"I ga-row poe-tatoes."
He leaned in closer, the stench of cleaning fluid emanating from his capped teeth.
I was waiting for a job interview at an enormous restaurant in the old warehouse district in Chicago, sitting at a shiny bar and feeling as though I had somehow slipped into an episode of The Sopranos, all the Bada Bing! of the drunken mobsters drinking bottomless glasses of vodka at 3 in the afternoon on a weekday, but (mercifully) nary a nipple tassle in sight.
Two men sat next to me, their conversation in Polish becoming increasingly loud, blurry, blotto. The man with the wedding ring kept trying to direct conversation toward me: "KIRA. Kee-ra. Like Knightley! Yes! KEE-RA. What you doing here. You have drink. You drink with us."
"No, really, for the tenth time, thank you, but I have an interview."
"I grow potatoes. No! I joking! I cement-mixer. I mix cement! No! I joking! I am investment banker," as he slugs down the fourth vodka of the past 20 minutes. Sure you are. The whole scene reminded me of the first (only?) party I went to in high school, with some Polish friends. Inexplicably, there were several extremely tall guys in their mid-twenties, maybe even thirties, standing around pouring drinks for all of the 16-year olds. "You want screw-driver?" one leered. "Vodka. The Polish water!" he laughed too boisterously. I acquiesced, and sipped the pulpy brew until I felt warm, and danced to a Tiesto remix pumping out of the flashy speakers in the corner.
The two men called me over as I walked out of the interview, fumbling to put their arms around me and unapologetically feel me up in the process.
"KIRA! KEE-RA. YOU GET IT? YOU GET JOB?! Wonderful! Oh! My phone ringing! Here, you take the woman. You can't drink with us? No? You sure? Ok, we see you next week then!"
2 comments:
I live with some polish people for a while and at the time was too immature to accept them as people. I kind of feel regret for this every so often.
Maybe they were objectively annoying but that is no excuse for my opinion.
this comment is a confession.
It is not particularly relevant.
sorry.
but i do like the post.
haha wait, so you got this job? does this mean you will be seeing these fellas all the time now? yesss.
on a side note, i think polish is a wonderful sounding language. i rented tapes from the library once but didn't get very far. lots of "p" sounds and "szch" sounds. i love it!
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